They're Just Jealous

Any time anyone has a discussion about why and how come the rest of the world feels anything but positive warm fuzzy feelings about America, especially if the discussion is between Americans, and most especially if those Americans have never actually been off of American soil, it'll make a predictable decline from Statement A to Statement C.

Statement A- "Everyone wants to be an American. This is the greatest country on the planet. Land of the Free. Home of the Brave."

Well, to be honest, although America IS a very nice place (mostly) and we are free (mostly) and brave (mostly) the shocking truth is that quite a number of people who live elsewhere DON'T want to be Americans. We're also known for our less desirable traits such as aggressiveness, pushiness, selfishness and an almost prideful ignorance- all things Americans abroad have driven home to every other country in the world.

Other countries have things like running water, grocery stores, opportunity for the industrious and excellent educational systems. Rumor has it there are even flush toilets in other countries.

Statement B- "America has been the World's Protector- why don't they appreciate us, those ungrateful bastards".

Although SOME of the military intervention abroad has been purely humanitarian in nature, a whole lot more has been totally self-serving, something that's evident when our military presence remains long after the immediate threat is gone. It comes as a shock to alot of Americans that we overstay our welcome many places (refer to the less desirable trait list above).

Statement C- "They're Just Jealous".

I don't think so. I think they just don't like us. I think they may WANT to like us but we make it so difficult.

For instance- it came to me as in a vision why we're so disliked the world over and it all boils down to three words-

Sun Chips Bag

Yes, Sun Chips Bag. Americans are angry, annoyed and positively obsessing about Frito Lay's new bag that the snack chips Sun Chips come in.

I'm not sure what started it- the bags have been out at least 3 months, but suddenly it's everywhere- Facebook, YouTube, the Today show, even an article in the Wall Street Journal- all having to do with how LOUD the bag is.

We live on a planet where there is hunger, poverty, pollution, inequalities of all sorts, and Americans are spending a huge amount of time and energy bitching about the noise a paper sack makes when we open it to knosh on our marginally healthy but still mostly empty calorie expensive SNACK food.

What slays me is that most of the people bitching about it live and work in huge cities filled with noise that's constant, gnawing and oppressive. To drown it out they've always got their Ipods in their ears or some sort of media on.

Really? Your BAG is too noisy? Poor, poor baby. How EVER will you manage to EAT YOUR BETWEEN MEAL SNACK in enjoyment???

The bag is too noisy. I'm sorry. I can't stop typing that.

The bag is too noisy. Nope. Still absofuckinglutely ridiculous.

And the very epitome of Why the Rest of the World Dislikes America.