photo by Sheri Dixon

Tuesday, January 25, 2011

Lucky Ducks

So last week, we were given the good news we hold onto every four months.

The cancer doctor said "Mr. Dixon- there is nothing of note in your head", meaning, of course, that the cancer has not returned, and we are dismissed for another few months. The cancer doctor thinks the "nothing of note in your head" comment is wildly hilarious, as do we, so it's all good.

As an added bonus, he said we may stay away for six months now, since the cancer has been gone for almost four years. We are breathing a little easier, sleeping a little better, daring to feel a little more fortunate than we did before.

Luck is a funny thing.

Because shit just happens. It's easier, neater, more comforting to imagine and believe that Everything Happens for a Reason, but I'm thinking that most of the time it doesn't. Most of the time Shit Really Does Just Happen.

Good people get slammed with alot of crap.
Bad people win the lottery.

There's no ulterior cosmic motive to it- no behind the scenes god knows all souls and rewards/punishes accordingly. This is Life. It's messy, beautiful, tragic, hilarious and almost completely random.

And it's OK.

When we were seeing the pain doctor last week he asked Ward's medical record number- at MD Anderson you can forget your name, address, birthdate, social security number- you are known by your medical record number and better have that baby memorized.

Ward's is very easy- a combination of only 2 numbers in a nicely arranged pattern.

So for almost four years, clerical and medical staff have all said the same thing-
"Wow. That's an easy number- how lucky for YOU".

And for almost four years, I've replied the same way-
"Yes. How lucky we are to have an easy to remember number at the CANCER HOSPITAL".

The reaction is generally nervous self-concious laughter on the part of the staff.

The pain doctor, however, looked at me, then at Ward, and said "Wow. She goes straight for the jugular, doesn't she?"

Ward smiled and said "Yep. She's a mean 'un".

Pain doctor- "And I think she hit the carotid too..."

I just smiled sweetly and said "Well, as long as I was already there- I like to be efficient".

And we all laughed.


  1. First of all, congratulations! I am so happy for you and your family that Ward has nothing of note in his head. :)

    Secondly, I couldn't agree with you more about the quixotic nature of luck. Embracing the idea that there is no larger cosmic meaning is hard to do, but very freeing once accomplished.

    Loved this post!

  2. Every now and then I track back to a 'referring' site to see how people found my own blog, and today it led me back here, where I found my "If I Were God..." on your 'brilliant' list. I am flattered, grateful and appreciative of your fine taste in blogs! Tomorrow is 'Wanna-Be Wednesday' where other creatives (such as yourself) can put forth an idea for what they would do if they were God. Last week's best idea, by Fred of TheFredEffect, will post in all it's glory. And new ideas will show up in comments -God-willing, along with yours (you-willing!). Hope to see you there.